


Disable

by hollyandvice (hiasobi_writes)



Series: Holly's Round Eight H/C Bingo Card [2]
Category: The Diabolic Series - S. J. Kinkaid
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-23
Updated: 2017-06-23
Packaged: 2018-11-18 04:58:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11284191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hiasobi_writes/pseuds/hollyandvice
Summary: Truth be told, Tyrus never quite managed to shake some of the core beliefs of the Helionic faith. He'd tried—oh, how he'd tried—but there were some things that could not be ignored.And this—the sanctity of life—was one of them.Tyrus mourns the first visible casualty in his fight to save the Empire.





	Disable

Tyrus' hand aches where it's wrapped around Nemesis'. He wants to release her, but knowing that he can't hurt her like this helps him be unafraid of allowing himself this one tell. He's spent years hiding them, but here, now, as everything begins, he allows himself this comfort, small though it may be. He knows what's coming, knows what might happen should anything go awry, and so here, now, he allows himself this show of weakness, selfish and dangerous though it may be.

Truth be told, Tyrus never quite managed to shake some of the core beliefs of the Helionic faith. He'd tried—oh, how he'd tried—but there were some things that could not be ignored.

And this—the sanctity of life—was one of them.

So as he watches Dandras' ship careen off course in just the wrong manner, he can barely restrain the desire to leap to his feet.

_Disable. Do not destroy._ That had been his intent. But intent meant nothing in the face of reality, and that, perhaps, is what made him differ so from his contemporaries. Intent and hopes and dreams were all well and good, but ignorance of one's responsibilities was unacceptable in the face of reality. He'd caused the pilot's death. It was not a true accident. He was a killer now, no better than the Emperor or his grandmother.

He can feel the twitch in his fingers. He folds his arms to hide the motion. He wills his fingers still.

_Disable. Do not destroy._ And oh, how he'd hoped that this would not come to pass, that his plans would unfold as they were intended. That he could spare every life that was under his protection. But it could not be. He'd tried to save the Luminars, and had almost failed. He'd tried to save the Exalted, and had almost failed. And though he could not have saved all the so-called Heretic families killed in Randevald's great purge, he can't help but feel their lives upon his conscience. Too many. Too many.

His fingers twitch again. The Emperor speaks. He responds by rote. _More than I would have wished to lose_ , he says, and the words hang heavy on his soul. He can scarcely breathe.

_Disable. Do not destroy._ Too many lives had already been lost in the battle for the throne. His cousins. His aunts and uncles. His _parents_. He'd never asked for this, never wished for it, and yet, here he sits, blood on his hands and on his soul and there is no turning back from this. Indeed, since Nemesis had pleaded the Luminar girl's case to him, his whole timetable had been moved up. He'd never intended to move so quickly, and yet, for her, he had. He can't find it in him to regret the loss of this life as deeply as he wants to if it means the safety of the universe and the safety of Nemesis. He wants to regret it down to the depths of his soul, oh, how he wants to regret it so deeply. But he cannot. Not when it will save so many more lives.

Winton is caught. Tyrus stands. And though he wishes he could leave Nemesis behind, he knows his own limits, so he brings her with him. He does not know if he is strong enough to stand alone, and so he will not. He will stand with her, and she will make him strong.

_Disable. Do not destroy._ Perhaps it is time to let go of this promise. Perhaps it is time to acknowledge the path he has wrought. Perhaps it is time to face facts. He will honor the lives that are lost and he will be grateful for them, but he may never be able to regret those lost in the service of the greater good. There is no more room for hiding or temperance or restraint. To keep the universe safe, and, indeed, to protect whatever may or may not exist of the _Living Cosmos_ , the time for caution has passed. The time for temperance in the face of his enemies has passed. The time for patience and honoring the sanctity of all life has passed.

The time for the destruction of his family has come. He will take their fate in his hands, and he will save all the people in the Empire.

The time for a new future has come. He will face the consequences when the time comes, and pay the price for forfeiting Dandras' life, but, until then, he will work for the greater good, heavy though it may weigh on his soul.

_Disable. Do not destroy. Unless they would destroy you first._ So he will destroy. For the greater good, let them think what they like. He will pay any price on his soul if it means the safety of the people in the Empire. For the greater good.

He stares down at Winton and feels a deep emptiness that he has placed so heavy a burden on the man's soul. Perhaps, one day, he may be able to tell the man the truth. But until then, he too shall be only a step toward the greater good.

Tyrus takes a deep breath and then, willing his fingers not to shake, lifts his hand for silence.

_Disable. Do not destroy. But look to the future, and perhaps then this will be worth it._

_Disable. Do not destroy._

**Author's Note:**

> Unbetaed. [Come hang with me on tumblr!](http://hollyandvice.tumblr.com/)


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